It’s natural to be concerned and want to help a loved one who’s overweight. After all, the CDC reports that a high body mass index (BMI) increases one’s risk for health problems like type 2 diabetes, cardiovascular disease, and cancer and also correlates negatively with one’s quality of life.
But caution is warranted; warn the experts. Losing weight is a touchy subject and an individual decision. Mindfulness can help you approach the conversation in a way that conveys your message to your friend or family member without causing unnecessary distress.
Dr. Ariela Vasserman of NYU Langone Health warns that discussing one’s weight and attempts to lose weight with a loved one might be “extremely triggering for that individual. A conversation’s success depends on a number of aspects, including timing and empathy. It’s conceivable that people avoid the topic altogether because of the deep feelings of guilt and embarrassment prompted by the attempts of others.
It’s not just the words you use, but how you use them, that make a difference when having conversations about losing weight.
Vijaya Surampudi, MD, assistant professor of medicine in the division of human nutrition at UCLA Health in Los Angeles, says, “It is a really sensitive topic, and words are everything when discussing it with loved ones.”
Here are some guidelines for how to broach the subject of weight loss with a loved one.
Choosing the right time and place
A conducive environment is required in order to have a conversation about losing weight. Find a spot that is free of noise and distractions where you can both sit down and have a conversation. Determine when your loved one is most at ease and ready to engage in conversation and pick that time.
Expressing your concerns
Start the conversation by expressing your genuine concern for their health and well-being. Use “I” statements to convey your feelings rather than making accusatory remarks.
Be empathetic and non-judgmental
Approach the topic with empathy and understanding. Avoid being judgmental or critical. Remember that their struggle with weight is personal, and they may be dealing with their own emotional challenges.
Offer your support
Let the person you care about know that you are there to support them, no matter where their journey takes them. Give them the assurance that you will be there for them each and every step of the way.
Suggesting professional help
If necessary, gently suggest seeking professional guidance, such as from a dietitian or therapist, to ensure they receive expert advice.
Encourage small steps
Encourage your loved one to take small, manageable steps toward their weight-loss goals. Setting achievable milestones can boost their confidence.
Educate yourself
Take the time to educate yourself about healthy weight loss and nutrition. This will enable you to provide informed guidance and recommendations.
Be patient
Losing weight is a slow process, and it’s normal to experience occasional setbacks along the way. If they are making sluggish progress or encountering difficulties along the way, show patience and understanding.
Avoid trigger words
Avoid using language that may trigger negative emotions or body image issues. Focus on the benefits of a healthier lifestyle rather than appearance.
Maintain open communication
Keep the lines of communication open. Regularly check in with your loved ones to see how they are doing and if they need any additional support.
Share success stories
Discuss the experiences of those who have successfully lost the desired amount of weight for themselves. Your loved one can get inspiration and motivation from positive examples.
Leading by example
Consider making healthy lifestyle changes yourself. Leading by example can show your loved ones that you’re on this journey together.
Respect their choices
Respect their autonomy and choices. Ultimately, the decision to pursue weight loss should be theirs, and they should feel in control of their journey.
Offering healthy alternatives
Introduce healthier eating options and activities that you can enjoy together. This can make the process more enjoyable and less daunting.
Having a healthy weight-loss conversation with a loved one is a compassionate and supportive act. Remember that their well-being is the top priority, and your role is to provide encouragement, understanding, and a listening ear.